FACEBOOK AND FRIENDS

I'M GONE

I made the decision, just before Easter to delete my Facebook account permanently - which I did on Easter Monday and it is a true relief!

People asked me why I am leaving Facebook and the answer is really quite simple:

I see absolutely no more use or benefit except that it wastes my time and the culture that has been cultivated there is just not my cup of tea anymore. So eliminating it was the only logical consequence for me.

I announced the deletion of my account to my 1382 „friends“ and asked them to let me know if they would like to stay in touch in the real world - the one I actually live in - and if so, send me a message so we can exchange our contact data if we don’t have it.

I know I don’t have a big reach - I simply know too little of the algorithms that Facebook uses - and I never really cared much, so I am guessing that only a fraction of my „friends“ actually saw my post. I also know that most will not even notice I am gone as the attention span on a post or on social media, in general, is usually not more than a few seconds, and the relevance of the “friendships” is very close to zero - but that is only my very personal educated guess.

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If you enjoy reading my Change & Evolve Letter, I would be delighted if you share it with your friends!

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Admittedly from quite a few, I have the information but from most, I don’t. I was not surprised that only about a dozen got back to me. Actually, in the aftermath, I was quite surprised that it was that many. It’s been several weeks now and I must say I do not miss Facebook whatsoever.

I still have several social media accounts and that is probably still too much. I am wondering which one(s) need(s) to go next. This is actually fun. I am inclined to keep one or the other but who knows… One down, more to go! Perhaps after two years of working mainly online, I am just weary of this superficial online world.

I also do not care to read any glossy magazines as they bore me and the advertisements on every other page simply annoy me. But I know that these magazines are very popular and more often than not cause people (especially women) that leaf through them to hate their body and their lives afterward. Something very similar happens on social media constantly.

Don’t get me wrong, I am actually not opposed to social media as a tool and the amazing possibilities it has to offer, I am opposed to living in or for social media - but that’s just me.

I also notice though and don’t cease to be stunned and amused by the glossy life that many people pretend to lead there and seem to forget their real life – and with some, I know what their real life looks like…
This is not an attack on social media or against the people who present a perfect and photo-shopped life that is worlds away from reality – some just show (almost) anything for a “like”!

I am the first to admit that I enjoy it when people like my letters, watch my videos, or comment on what I post (preferably positively of course) – and it is always nice to get some form of recognition. But I also realize that many people gave me a like on Facebook without even reading my posts or looking at my videos. Thankfully I have never gotten lost in this world though as I know how superficial it is most of the time.

So many people show things they believe will get the most likes, they show a grand lifestyle they would like to have and when they turn the phone or the computer off reality often hits like a sledgehammer leaving them behind in despair. The real world quickly appears dull and bleak and they want the colourful life of the glossy magazines and social media back. I have seen people get hopelessly lost in this illusory world.

I am not saying to only present the harsh and cold truth as we all certainly need beauty and happiness in our lives, but I would advocate for a little bit more reality on social media. How fun would it be to see real people with real lives that you can actually relate to? Fortunately, there are some out there who are showing more of that. And there is really no harm in a little ideal world and joy in our everyday lives (which is there any way if we are open to seeing it), as long as we still know the difference between joyful entertainment and reality…

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🎶My Song of the Week

Is a stunning song that evolved on the fly…

For more good music, go to this Spotify playlist where you can find all the songs from the Change & Evolve Letters!

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📚My Poem of the Week

Is by Edgar Albert Guest (1881-1959)

Old Friends

I do not say new friends are not considerate and true,
Or that their smiles ain't genuine, but still I'm tellin' you
That when a feller's heart is crushed and achin' with the pain,
And teardrops come a-splashin' down his cheeks like summer rain,
Becoz his grief an' loneliness are more than he can bear,
Somehow it's only old friends, then, that really seem to care.
The friends who've stuck through thick an' thin, who've known you, good an' bad,
Your faults an' virtues, an' have seen the struggles you have had,
When they come to you gentle-like an' take your hand an' say:
'Cheer up! we're with you still,' it counts, for that's the old friends' way.

The new friends may be fond of you for what you are today;
They've only known you rich, perhaps, an' only seen you gay;
You can't tell what's attracted them; your station may appeal;
Perhaps they smile on you because you're doin' something real;
But old friends who have seen you fail, an' also seen you win,
Who've loved you either up or down, stuck to you, thick or thin,
Who knew you as a budding youth, an' watched you start to climb,
Through weal an' woe, still friends of yours an' constant all the time,
When trouble comes an' things go wrong, I don't care what you say,
They are the friends you'll turn to, for you want the old friends' way.

The new friends may be richer, an' more stylish, too, but when
Your heart is achin' an' you think your sun won't shine again,
It's not the riches of new friends you want, it's not their style,
It's not the airs of grandeur then, it's just the old friend's smile,
The old hand that has helped before, stretched out once more to you,
The old words ringin' in your ears, so sweet an', Oh, so true!
The tenderness of folks who know just what your sorrow means,
These are the things on which, somehow, your spirit always leans.
When grief is poundin' at your breast — the new friends disappear
An' to the old ones tried an' true, you turn for aid an' cheer.

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👀Impressions

Is another one from my short Easter trip this year to St. Peter Ording

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If you would like to connect with me, find out more about the Enneagram and yourself, and how it can transform you and your life, I would be happy to take the time for a speed coaching call that you can reserve right here go to my website or simply hit reply and get in touch with me directly.

Have a sunny weekend and I would love to hear what your take on Facebook and other social media platforms is!

Yours

Tanja 🤗