Today I would like to tell you a story about a little girl. This girl was born in 1967 in a city in Germany and moved with her family to a small village in the country when she was three years old. It was a dream for children because there were children to play with in every street, and there were farms, fields, meadows, and forests to play in. This girl loved to play catch with the boys outside, build dams in the streams, climb trees and do all the things boys like to do. The ultimate punishment for this girl was to wear dresses or do "girl things". Her older sister was the exact opposite, a real girl who liked to wear dresses and bows, had long hair, and played with dolls and barbies.
The little girl looked more like Michel from Lรถnneberga
than a girl. The girl didn't care at all. Ok, when she wanted a Carrera track for Christmas and got a doll (and one that could cry when you moved its arm down like a one-armed bandit), her world came crashing down - but thatโs a different story.
If this girl had been asked between the ages of three and twelve whether she was a boy or a girl, she would have said with absolute certainty that she wanted to be a boy.
But she was not asked; she was simply allowed to develop into the person she is today, 55 years later. An amazing and proud woman who wants nothing more than to be exactly that - a woman, all woman!
You will have guessed that the little girl is me. I am so glad that my natural development was not taken away from me and that I did not have to deal with my sexuality and my gender as a child. I was able to use my childhood to discover myself and try things out. Anything else would probably have only confused and traumatised me. I was thankfully spared that.
Today we are producing a GEN C - generation confused!
I was not aware how far this gender madness had progressed (for a long time already) and I am terrified and in shock at how children are being completely confused about who or what they are. Natural development and childhood are being taken away from children in a horrible and disgusting way. What shocked me the most though is that this page called REGENBOGENPORTAL (rainbow portal) which is managed by the Federal Ministry for Family Affairs, Senior Citizens, Women, and Youth actually encourages children and youths to question their gender.
For those who do not speak German, here is the translation of the page linked above:
Young and trans-gendered
Some children or young people realise:
I'm not a girl at all.
Or: I'm not a boy at all.
Even if the others see me that way.
We have tips for you.
Am I transgender?
How do I know?
Take your time.
Try it out.
Do you feel more comfortable as a girl?
Or do you feel more comfortable as a boy?
What's important is that you feel good now.
It doesn't matter how you'll live in 10 years.
As a man?
As a woman?
You don't have to decide that right now.
Take puberty blockers
Are you still very young?
And have you not yet reached puberty?
You can ask your doctor,
if puberty blockers might help you.(Originally the wording was: "Are you still very young? And have you not yet reached puberty? Then you can take puberty blockers. (...) These drugs make sure that you don't reach puberty." After criticism of this wording, the ministry corrected it a few days ago. Now it says: "... So you can ask your doctor whether puberty blockers might help you".)
Puberty blockers are special medicines.
The word blocker means to stop something.
These medicines make sure
that you don't go through puberty.
This means that your body does not develop any further.
Neither in the direction of a woman.
Nor in the direction of a man.
This gives you more time to think.
And you can think in peace:
Which body suits me?
Take hormones
Maybe you'll say:
No, I am quite sure.
This body really doesn't fit my feelings.
Then you can take certain hormones.
These hormones make you more masculine.
Or they make you more feminine.
For example, they change your voice.
Or you get more breasts.
Or a beard.
It depends on which hormones you take.
Operation
Hormones can't do everything.
Some things can only be done with surgery.
For example, changing the sex parts.
You have to be at least 18 years old to have an operation.
It doesn't matter what your body looks like.
Some transgender people say:
My body is perfectly OK.
I don't need to change it.
How can I change my name?
You want to have a different name on your identity card?
You have to apply to the court.
You also have to talk to two assessors.
Are you under 18?
Then you have to ask your parents first.
Or your guardian.
They have to agree.
Otherwise it won't work.
This is important
You can call yourself whatever you want in everyday life.
For example, at school or in a club.
The school and the club can use your new name.
The name you have chosen.
You don't need a new identity card for that.
And you don't have to go to court.
Do I have to be a boy or a girl?
No, you don't have to choose.
Many people are not just men.
And not just a woman.
You can be both.
Some people don't understand me.
Why is that?
Many people are insecure
In Germany you can decide many things for yourself.
You can also decide for yourself
whether you are a boy.
Or whether you are a girl.
Maybe these adults need more time.
Or more counselling.
At some point, though, the adults realise:
This is your life.
Only you know what you feel.
And who you really are.
How can I change my body?
I want my body to fit the way I feel.
There are different ways:
Stop taking medication
Maybe one day you will say:
My body does fit how I feel.
Then you simply stop taking the puberty blockers.
Your body will continue to develop.
It's about the same as it was before you took the puberty blockers.
Make sure you talk to your doctor first!
You can only take these hormones after puberty.
Children are not allowed to have these hormones.
Men can have breast surgery.
To flatten them.
This can be done earlier.
Before you are 18.
Inform yourself well beforehand.
Get advice at a counselling centre.
Do I really have to change my body?
No.
Only one thing is important:
How do you feel?
Do you feel like a girl?
Then you are a girl.
Do you feel like a boy?
Then you are a boy.
You can wait and see.
And only later think about hormones.
Or about operations.
Many people don't care at all.
It doesn't matter to them
whether they're a man or a woman.
Some people don't know.
They are insecure.
Some then say bad things.
For example:
That can't be!
Next week you'll probably think differently again!
Or they say:
You can only wear this dress at home!
You are not allowed to wear it to school!
Such sentences are mean and hurtful.
Some people want to protect you
Sometimes adults think the same:
We just don't talk about it.
Then it will pass.
That's how adults want to protect you.
Of course, that's nonsense.
Who understands me and can help me?
Tips
For example, there are leisure activities in your area.
Or self-help groups for transgender young people.
And counselling centres for you and your parents.
Good doctors
Are you looking for a good doctor?
You should pay attention to this:Does the doctor use your new name? Or are you constantly being called by the wrong name?
The doctor talks about you.
Do they use the right words?
For example, do they say he or she?
The way you think is right?
Do you feel taken seriously?
Doesnโt that all sound so lovely and simple? If you are not happy with who you are - change it. And if you change your mind - change it back.
Children go through phases in their lives and at one point or the other a girl may feel more like a boy, as I did, and vice versa. And that is ok. Why is it necessary to confuse children even moreร We all know that childhood can be challenging enough as it is so why add more stress? And how the hell is a child supposed to decide or even challenge their gender? Why not just give them time to develop? Giving children medication, and puberty blockers like tic tacs doesnโt worry you? Then something is terribly wrong with our society. I remember how confused I was when I went into puberty. I remember how weird I found my body. I remember how I hated those changes at first. What twelve-year-old thinks itโs great to get her period, with cramps and all that comes with it? If you would have offered me an out to that at that age I might have even taken it, simply to not have to go through all of that. But I am so happy no one did that to me. We all have growing pains and yes I do acknowledge that there are a minority of children that are possibly born into the wrong body. But confusing all children telling them that itโs ok and that if you change your gender or even suppress puberty to think about what gender you might like to be is a crime. And if you again change your mind and want to go into puberty, you just stop taking the blockers and all is good. Medication has side effects - ALWAYS!!!
But I suppose it is important to understand what puberty blockers are - even if it appears almost self-explanatory. So here is some information I found:
What are puberty blockers?
So-called puberty blockers act on the pituitary gland. The pituitary gland sends out messenger substances in the body that stimulate the production of sex hormones. The drug blocks the pituitary gland, which means, for example, that testosterone is no longer produced in the growing male body. The development of typical physical masculinity characteristics, such as voice change or beard growth, is thus stopped.
Children or adolescents can thus interrupt a physical development in the wrong direction for them and later start hormone therapy.
When Do Children Start Puberty Blocker Meds?
Your childโs doctor will confirm when theyโre ready to start puberty blockers. They first need to be evaluated by a trained mental health professional. Theyโll also need to:
Give their doctor an informed consent (or have their parents/caretakers/guardians consent to their treatment and agree to support them through the treatment)
Have an intense, long-lasting pattern of gender dysphoria or nonconformity
Show that their gender dysphoria started or got worse at the beginning of puberty
Look into medical, social, or psychological issues that might interfere with treatment
Be in the early stages of puberty
For most children, puberty starts around the age of 10 or 11. But some kids may start earlier or later than this. Your child may take GnRH at the beginning of puberty to stop secondary sex characteristics. But they could also start treatment in later stages of puberty to end their periods, stop erections, or avoid continued growth of secondary sex characteristics.
A pediatric endocrinologist will prescribe, give, and monitor GnRH analogue treatment. Theyโll usually give this medication to your child as a shot (every month or every 3 months) or through an implant in their arm (which their doctor will replace every 12 months).
During their treatment, your childโs doctor will also give them regular blood tests to see how well the medication works.
Most kids take GnRH for years. But each person may have a different preference. Your child may decide they want to stop puberty-blocking treatment and try other hormone treatments. Others may pursue gender affirmation surgery in the future
What Are the Benefits of Puberty Blockers?
If your child doesnโt identify with the gender they were given at birth, uncomfortable feelings may grow during puberty. Gender dysphoria is the term doctors use to describe the distress and unease that happen when gender identity and designated gender donโt align. If your child has gender dysphoria, puberty blockers may help them:
Lower depression and anxiety
Improve their overall mental health
Have better social interactions and connections with other kids
Stay away from thoughts or actions linked to self-harm
Avoid future surgeries for gender confirmation
Puberty blockers are reversible. If your child begins these medications, it doesnโt mean that their puberty stops forever. Instead, these medications are a short-term pause in puberty. Theyโll stop the effects of puberty for as long as your kid is on them. If they stop the treatment, their body will go through puberty in the way it was assigned at birth.
Are There Side Effects or Risks With Puberty Blockers?
Like other medications, there are some side effects of GnRH analogue treatment. They include:
Hot flashes
Weight gain
Swelling where they got the shot
Headaches
Crying and crankiness
Restlessness
Acne
Rashes
Other short-term effects from puberty blockers may include:
Insomnia or muscle aches
Fatigue
Shifts in mood
Changes in breast tissue
Irregular period or spotting (for people whose periods arenโt totally suppressed by puberty blockers)
Your child might also notice long-term changes like:
Issues with future surgery. If children with external male genitalia start treatment with GnRH analogues early in puberty, they may not develop the right amount of scrotal or penile skin for gender-affirming surgery. There are other methods you can look into instead, though.
Problems with self-esteem. If your child doesnโt begin puberty around the same time as their peers, they may develop lower self-esteem.
Delayed growth plate closure. This could lead to taller adult height.
Changes to their bone growth and density. Your child may have lower bone density. Because of this, your doctor will want to make sure they get enough exercise, calcium, and vitamin D. Theyโll also keep a close watch on their bone density to make sure their bones remain strong and healthy.
Effects on their future fertility. Puberty blockers may lead to changes in your ability to have children in the future. Ask your doctor more about your specific risk.
In Summary, I find this development of giving children the feeling that there is something almost generally wrong with them very disturbing. Growing up can be painful, perhaps thatโs why itโs called growing pains. It terrifies me that we are bringing a generation of deeply disturbed woke into the future, that look for a pill at every stop to cure their growing pains.
I am absolutely convinced that the majority of parents want the best for their children. But I wonder if it is a new variant of Munchausen's syndrome that parents want to have "special" children and enjoy the attention it brings. When I read that some parents already want to have changes made to their three-year-old children, and these parents even boast about it online, my stomach turns.
As always, and I do not tire to mention it, these are my very personal views and I am open to a respectful discussion.
๐ถMy Song of the Day
For more good music, go to this Spotify playlist where you can find all the songs from the Change & Evolve Letters!
๐My Poem of the Day
By the poet Claude McKay (1889-1948)
Adolescence
There was a time when in late afternoon The four-oโclocks would fold up at dayโs close Pink-white in prayer, and โneath the floating moon I lay with them in calm and sweet repose. And in the open spaces I could sleep, Half-naked to the shining worlds above; Peace came with sleep and sleep was long and deep, Gained without effort, sweet like early love. But now no balmโnor drug nor weed nor wineโ Can bring true rest to cool my bodyโs fever, Nor sweeten in my mouth the acid brine, That salts my choicest drink and will forever.
๐Impressions
This was me, five years old, on my first day in school. And yes, they made me wear a dress and I despised it!
If you would like to connect with me, find out more about the Enneagram and yourself, and how it can transform you and your life, I would be happy to take the time for a speed coaching call that you can reserve right here go to my website or simply hit reply and get in touch with me directly.
Wishing you a happy day wherever you are. If you enjoy my letter, share it, leave a comment and click the heart or get in touch with me directly!
Yours
Tanja ๐ค
Big surprise thereโs an increase in gender dysphoria when the messaging to pre-pubescent children is โyou should be confused about your genderโ. Also, puberty blockers will solve all your problems. However, they are just as likely to make you feel a whole lot worse. Good luck.