GRATITUDE 🙏🏼

AND APPRECIATION

I have, for some strange reason, always seen life a bit like a balance sheet. Coming from someone who has nothing to do with accounting, finances, or anything even remotely related it may be a somewhat strange statement, yet bear with me. Perhaps it is because I like things to be simple. You might also ask what that could possibly have to do with gratitude or appreciation. Again, bear with me.

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” — John F. Kennedy

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Most people find it incredibly easy to see what they don't have, what they lack in life. They simply see the negative things and often focus exclusively on those. Many people also like to focus on what they can't do or where their deficits lie. Or course, this is a very much simplified view as there are so many different types of people. We all know the glass half full or half empty conundrum…

The debit side of their balance sheet is often full whereas the credit side is almost empty. My very personal belief is that this often comes from a lack of gratitude and appreciation, amongst other things.

“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” — Albert Schweitzer

Let’s answer the most important questions first though, and each and everyone of you may have a different definition and here is mine:

What is gratitude? 

Gratitude is a state of mind that has emotional, rational, and physiological components that go beyond merely being thankful. When you experience true gratitude, you feel positive and warm about a person or a situation, which is your thankfulness and feeling blessed by the object of the gratitude. 

“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.” — Marcus Tullius Cicero

What is appreciation?

Again, this is my personal view. I see appreciation as the act of recognising or understanding that something is valuable and important. Appreciation doesn’t require transactions or even interactions. I can appreciate my friends even when I don’t not see them often. Appreciation generates gratitude, not the other way around. We can be grateful for help from loved ones without appreciating their efforts, taking them for granted. When we appreciate the help, we are also grateful.

“Appreciation is a wonderful thing: It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.” — Voltaire

Keeping all of that in mind, I started writing my own very personal balance sheet - not for the first time - and to me it always makes sense to begin with the credit side. What I realised very quickly is that once you start, there really is no end to it and I could have written so much more. It may be that you could still write what you lack on the debit side - and I am sure we all have plenty of things to put on there -  but seeing the abundance that shows itself once you put it in writing, all those things you already have in your life that you can appreciate and be grateful for - why even bother? Don’t get me wrong, I know they are there and are important as they show us where we can improve, yet for today’s post I prefer to focus on the good.

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I am sure that most of you have heard that showing and expressing gratitude is associated with such benefits as enhancing your mood and your outlook on life. In addition, it is also beneficial for your physiological health as it reduces heart rate and improves sleep quality. However, I believe it is also essential to understand the limitations of practicing gratitude.

“Give yourself a gift of five minutes of contemplation in awe of everything you see around you. Go outside and turn your attention to the many miracles around you. This five-minute-a-day regimen of appreciation and gratitude will help you to focus your life in awe.” — Wayne Dyer

While research may find an association between improved health outcomes and gratitude or having a grateful disposition, it doesn’t mean everyone should practise gratitude at all times. We are humans after all and we need to feel all of our emotions, the good and the ugly, which I very much encourage.

Whether appreciation and gratitude are helpful always depends on the depth of its expression. It can be expressed on cognitive and emotional levels. For example, when you write a list of the things you are thankful for, or what you have on the credit side of your balance sheet, you may realise that despite challenges, your life is often surprisingly good; in other words, gratitude may give you the perspective you need to feel more balanced and secure. However, despite this, the benefit from your gratitude expression may not be quite as profound as that of someone else’s, as writing out a list of good things that happen in our lives is not the same as truly believing in them. In my opinion, this is where appreciation comes into play. The appreciating of all the things written out will most certainly enhance a positive outlook on life.

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No matter how you practice gratitude, whether it is a daily practice of the things you are grateful for, or if you write them in a balance sheet, just think of them once in a while, make sure that you have an appreciation for them as well that will manifest itself to bring more light into your life.

Looking back on my life so far I must say that I have so much to be thankful for, so much gratitude and most of all I appreciate all of my life lessons, even - and perhaps especially - the painful ones. It has made me the person I am today and I do appreciate myself as much as I do others - one of my hardest learnings so far.

“'Thank you' is the best prayer that anyone could say. I say that one a lot. Thank you expresses extreme gratitude, humility, understanding.” — Alice Walker

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🎶My Song for you

I remembered this beautiful song by Maze featuring Frankie Beverly - I Wanna Thank You, while writing this letter. Probably the funkiest way to say THANK YOU!

For more good music, go to this Spotify playlist where you can find all the songs from the Change & Evolve Letters!

I added an extra song today as I just discovered this goosebump version of the beautiful song „What The World Needs Now“ and I am unbelievably grateful as it just puts a blissful smile on my face… I hope you enjoy it too!

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📚My Poem for you

Is by Lucy Maud Montgomery (1874-1942)

Gratitude

I thank thee, friend, for the beautiful thought
That in words well chosen thou gavest to me,
Deep in the life of my soul it has wrought
With its own rare essence to ever imbue me,
To gleam like a star over devious ways,
To bloom like a flower on the drearest days­
Better such gift from thee to me
Than gold of the hills or pearls of the sea.

For the luster of jewels and gold may depart,
And they have in them no life of the giver,
But this gracious gift from thy heart to my heart
Shall witness to me of thy love forever;
Yea, it shall always abide with me
As a part of my immortality;
For a beautiful thought is a thing divine,
So I thank thee, oh, friend, for this gift of thine.

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👀Impression

I am admittedly very grateful to Hippo for making me laugh while trying to squeeze into that little 📦…

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What does your personal balance sheet look like? What are you grateful for and what do appreciate most?

Let me know your thoughts in the comments, leave a ❤️ or send me a message. I always love hearing from you.

Wishing you a wonderful day wherever you are.

Yours

Tanja 🤗

Change & Evolve and feel free to get in touch