FEMINISM 🧍‍♀️

WHAT WAS ONCE A FIGHT FOR RIGHTS HAS BECOME ANOTHER TOXIC IDEOLOGY

Apr 18, 2025

As a woman, I would even claim to be a rather independent woman, it shames me what feminism has become.

Feminism, once a movement dedicated to securing fundamental rights for women—such as the right to vote, work, and be treated with dignity—has taken a troubling turn. Today’s so-called feminism, in many cases, has little to do with genuine equality or empowerment. Instead, it often promotes division, resentment, and complete detachment from reality.

Before I go any further, let me be clear: People are free to believe what they want and live how they choose. This is not an attack on personal choices but rather a critique of the modern feminist narrative that has strayed far from its original mission. My perspective may not be popular, but it is one I want to share.

The Myth of Sameness: Men and Women Are Not Equal

One of the most pervasive ideas in modern feminism is the insistence that men and women are the same - and, therefore, should be treated as identical in all aspects of life. But the truth is, we are not the same. We are not equal in the sense of being interchangeable. Men and women are biologically, psychologically, and emotionally different, and that is something to be embraced, not erased.

Equality should not mean sameness. Men and women bring different strengths to the table, and these differences complement each other - somehow even strange that this needs to be emphasised. For example, men are, on average, physically stronger than women, which has biological and evolutionary reasons. Women, on the other hand, tend to have a greater capacity for emotional intelligence and empathy. These are not weaknesses or strengths in competition with each other, they are simply differences that contribute to a balanced society.

And yet, today’s feminism seems to suggest that these differences are a problem that must be “fixed.” Why? Why is it so controversial to acknowledge the simple reality that we are wired differently? If anything, these distinctions should be celebrated, not condemned.

Here’s a quote that recently caught my attention—and not in a good way. It comes from the political offspring of Germany’s Green Party:

"It's not enough to use our individual attention to exploit mediocre men. We have to do that structurally if we want to be successful."
— Jette Nietzard, Chairwoman of the Green Youth

Now, I’ll be honest—I had to read this twice, and I’m still not entirely sure what she meant. Satire? Sarcasm? A misguided attempt at empowerment? Either way, the underlying tone is crystal clear: it's dismissive, divisive, and dripping with contempt for men. And whether it’s meant literally or metaphorically, it reveals something deeply troubling about the current trajectory of so-called feminism. When did equality become synonymous with targeted exploitation?

The Absurdity of "We Don’t Need Men"

A particularly toxic aspect of modern feminism is the growing rhetoric that suggests women don’t need men, that men are inherently oppressive, or even that the world would be better off without them. When I hear statements like, “I’d rather be alone in a forest with a bear than with a man,” I can’t help but cringe (and, admittedly, laugh a little). Good luck with that, ladies. If you think a grizzly is going to be more forgiving than a man holding the door open for you, you’re in for a reality check.

This kind of thinking is not only detached from reality, but it also fuels unnecessary hostility between men and women. The truth is, we do need each other. Humanity has survived and thrived because of the collaboration between the sexes. Men and women bring unique qualities that, when combined, create stronger families, healthier relationships, and more balanced societies.

And let’s be honest—how many self-proclaimed “independent” women still expect men to take out the trash, fix the car, or kill the spider in the corner? Independence is great, but let’s not pretend that interdependence is suddenly outdated.

The Death of Femininity

Another unfortunate byproduct of radical feminism is the erosion of traditional femininity. Women are encouraged to suppress their natural traits in the name of empowerment, but at what cost? Femininity should not be seen as a weakness. Traits like grace, compassion, and nurturing are not signs of submission - they are strengths that society desperately needs.

Yet, modern feminism often teaches women to reject these qualities in favour of a more aggressive, "masculine" approach to life. The result? Confused women who feel pressured to act in ways that contradict their natural inclinations and confused men who no longer know how to engage with women without fear of being attacked or labeled as sexist or misogynistic.

And here’s the irony - while women are being told to abandon their femininity, men are being criticised for embracing their masculinity. So, what exactly is the end goal here? A society of gender-neutral robots?

The Erosion of Mutual Respect

The growing hostility between men and women has led to a decline in mutual respect. Feminism once fought for women to be treated with dignity and respect, but now it seems to demand superiority rather than equality. Men are increasingly hesitant to engage with women in both personal and professional settings for fear of being accused of misconduct. Chivalry - once a sign of courtesy - is now often misinterpreted as patronising and, of course, misogynistic.

Shouldn’t we be working towards a society where men and women appreciate each other’s differences rather than fighting for dominance? Mutual respect should be the goal - not division.

Let’s bring back the days when a compliment wasn’t a crime and when holding the door open for someone was simply a kind gesture rather than an act of oppression.

Celebrating Our Differences

Rather than pushing a false narrative of sameness, we should celebrate the differences between men and women. Our distinct qualities are not something to be erased but something to be valued. As a woman, I want to be treated as such - not as a man. I appreciate acts of chivalry, I take pride in my femininity, and I believe that true empowerment comes from embracing who we are, not denying it.

And let’s not forget the practical benefits of our differences. Men and women bring different problem-solving skills, perspectives, and energies to the table. Whether in personal relationships, the workplace, or society as a whole, our strengths complement each other. Isn’t that something to be celebrated rather than resented?

🎶My Song for you

Is this beautiful song by Gabriels - Loyalty…

For more good music, go to this Spotify playlist where you can find all the songs from the Change & Evolve Letters!

📚My Poem for you

Is one I have used before but it doesn’t get old: Maya Angelou (1928—2014)

Phenomenal Woman

Text within this block will maintain its original spacing when published

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size   
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,   
The stride of my step,   
The curl of my lips.   
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,   
That’s me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,   
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.   
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.   
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,   
And the flash of my teeth,   
The swing in my waist,   
And the joy in my feet.   
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Men themselves have wondered   
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,   
They say they still can’t see.   
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,   
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.   
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.   
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,   
The bend of my hair,   
the palm of my hand,   
The need for my care.   
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.